A Single Day, Live My Life
by Dr Megalomania
Summary: One day passes... or does it, Yue recounts his life, reflects as the day changes into night and Clow dies and Yue finds new love...


Hello and welcome to My Little World Of Weirdness. 

Although I really, really really wish I own Yue, I don't. He and everyone else mention in the little ficcy belong to the ever wonderful CLAMP.

I also don't claim to be able to speak a word of Japanese or know the correct grammatical structure.

A Single Day, Live My Life. 

By Dr Megalomania.

"Yue. . . what are you doing up here?" A voice called to me. . .  oddly reminiscent of another.

"Yue. . ." Someone was calling me. No, I lie. He was calling me. I pulled my knees closer to my chest and refused to look up, my tear-streaked face remained hidden.

"Yue. . .  it's cold up here, what in heaven's name are you doing up here?"

"It's his fault." I mumbled into my knees.

"Yue? Please, what happened my little moon angel?"

At this, I could no longer restrain myself, I jerked my head up and showed my creator the damage Keroberos had done to my hair.

His eyes. . .  his always-happy eyes. . .  looked at the harm Keroberos had caused to my fringe. 

"Hmmm. . ." he said thoughtfully, "You two were fighting again?"

"It was *his* fault." I protested, "He broke your picture."

"Oh Yue." Clow murmured as he stroked the untouched hair trailing down my back. "It's not that bad, if I cut it right, it will look beautiful again. . ."

In my childhood, one cold December afternoon, Keroberos had decided to *help* our Master with his painting and tried to put paw prints on it, his claws ripped the canvas. We fought and, in the battle, he burnt my hair, that's why my fringe isn't as long as the rest of my hair. I'd cried as I saw the burnt hairs fall to the ground. I vowed I'd never cry again.

"Yue. . ." He startled me out of my thoughts.

"Yue. . .  it's late, what are you still doing up here?"

"I wanted to watch the moon rise." I purposely didn't meet his eyes, "It's pretty."

"But it's late Yue, I was worried."

"Why?" I knew the answer, I was Yue, I never broke the rules, and always did what I was told. 

"Because you never stay out this late." I'd been up here for hours, acutely aware of the time, waiting. . .

"Well. . . Today I did." I expected him to tell me off, as he would keroberos when he did something that displeased the master. Instead, he sat beside me. 

He smiled, gently as always. "The moon rise is pretty, isn't it?"

In my adolescence, one warm July night, I tried my hardest to annoy him, to prevent all the fatherly attention he bestow on Keroberos from being just that. All Keroberos'. It never worked, my Master *never* chaste me and then played rough and tumble on the floor with *me*. I swore I'd make him love me more than Keroberos.

"Yue. . ." How'd he known I had been there? 

"Yue. . .  it's so early. Didn't you come in last night at all?"

"No. I had no desire to sleep." I was so tired but I didn't want them to come back…

"Why not?" 

"My dreams of late have been. . .  strange." They had been haunting me. Images, feelings, fantasies . . . 

"I know." He knew? Of course he did.

"Why are they so?"

"Later, Yue, I will tell you later, but first, you need some sleep . . ."

As I approached my adulthood, in a February morning, I became confused. I realised that certain feelings I had felt for my Master in my childhood had become something else. And sometimes, just sometimes when I searched my Master's face I'd catch him unawares, and see the same feelings shining through his eyes. I. . .  I didn't understand, but it made me happy.

"Yue. . ." I clutched my knees close to my chest as soft foot falls approached, trying my hardest to not weep, to keep this façade of not caring.

"Yue. . .  it's raining."

"I know, Keroberos."

"You'll catch a cold." He spoke gently as if I might break if he spoke at his usual tone

"I can't." I hated him for caring about me, I wanted no-one to care for me, I'd allowed one to do that for me. . . 

"That's not the point."

"What is the point?" I could here my voice rising. "The Master is *dead*. There is no point anymore."

"Are you trying to follow him? Trying to die?" Keroberos was furious now, and it felt good. "We have our charge. Yue, Judgment Maker. Keroberos, Seal Guardian."

I covered myself with my wings. I wanted him to go away and leave me alone, just as He had left me, I wanted the world to leave, and take my life with it . . .

This night seemed caught between the setting of the sun and the rising of the moon.

Many years ago, the night Master Clow had died, I refused to leave the rooftop until he came for me, as he had always done. 

He never came, instead, as the rain grew steadily heavier, Keroberos came to get me, he talked and talked and I gave no answer. When he found he could talk no more, not a thing he could say would make me leave my perch; he lay beside me and slept. I refused to move. I didn't want to, in case. . .  Clow returned and found I had left. I never wanted to leave. Never.  I pledged never to love again.

I fell asleep up there. I didn't leave. I slept.

And awoke. The cards called to me.

It was time. Time for a new master to be chosen.

I glared down at this girl that Keroberos had chosen. She looked nothing like Clow. 

//Datte. . . //

            "Yue. . .  I. . .  Aishiteru." 

//Datte. . . //

. . . I could feel him. 

The night had begun its transition into day, and as Clow had already decided, I could not fight anymore. Sakura became the new mistress, but I . . .  I don't love her.

"What are you doing up here?"

So deeply lost in my dreams I didn't realise who or where I was. 

"Clow?" I cried and heard another voice cry another name. 

"Yuki. . .  what are you doing on my roof?"

I felt my other form's confusion as my own grief seeped into his expression.

"I . . .  don't know." 

            //Mustn't let us join.//

"I was. . ."

            //Waiting for him to come back for me. . . //

"I don't know, To-ya"

            //Where is he, To-ya?//

"Why did I come here?"

            //I loved him, To-ya, just as. . . //

"I love you."

By the look on his face I knew that we had spoken our feelings aloud, but from whom the words had flowed was a mystery. 

"I know." He knew. Of course he did.

"Come with me." He held his hand out. To Yuki or Yue? 

//Could you love me, To-ya?

Could you love the both of us?

I'm so warm and open with you yet I am as elusive as the light of the moon.//

 I made no move suggest I was going to go with him.

I looked up.

Dawn was moments away yet the land seemed drained of colour. . .  of life. 

He sits with me, looking at me with his sapphire eyes, so much like His always-happy eyes. I try to look at him; first I turn my head towards him and look at the roof tiles between us. Then at the still hand resting on them, my eyes travel up his arm. I stop at his lips. They twitch and fight a smile. 

I feel warm again, the first rays of sunlight break over the horizon. 

He leans towards me, gives me enough time to meet his gaze before he kisses me.

All to soon, he's pulling away again. I grasp his hand, not willing to lose this contact, this one contact, the only I have felt in so long.

The smile he fights wins, and spreads over his face.

He glances at the sunrise, "Sunrises are pretty, aren't they?"

Behind me, I notice the moon has set. The long night over.

"Yes, they are."

The new day has begun.

------

And now it's time for LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA

DrM: I start with an apology cos although I am working on the next instalment of my other ficcy –I promise I am – I just had to get this bit of angst off my chest. Thank you. Remember to R&R please!! Ja!


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